…well, tfm7 at the moment but I’m working on that.
Back to the post: in the interest of keeping a blog ‘relevant’, I’ve read that one should include ‘pillar posts’. PPs are posts (obviously) which, among other things, can be easily shared, and not specific to time, incidents or people. So, I reckon a selection of ’Top 10 ‘ somethings, along with some delicious food recipes and reviews, along with articles (published, hey) on the trials and tribulations of Tottenham Hotspur Football Club should help. This ‘Top 10’ has little in the way of comment but simply links to my absolute favourite tunes. Well, maybe some comment…
Smokey Robinson & The Miracles – Tears Of A Clown Early Guantanamo
I Second That Emotion, Shop Around, The Tracks Of My Tears and Going To A Go-Go all have claim to be up here. However, from the very first beat this tune, and vocals rise above almost everything and remain at the highest level until the tunes ends. The magnificent vocals from the main man – one of the great male voices of all time, and the fantastic instrumental support Robinson receives make this unmovable from my top three. The tune never drops a beat. It’s been my ringtone for years and I see no need to ever change that, irrespective of my mood. Until my mood changes, natch.
INXS – Beautiful Girl All wrong
Any song that opens with the line ‘Big Ears in the corner…’ gets my attention. And it’s about the only lyric by Michael Hutchence I ever did get. The white James Brown, if you will. As with Mr Robinson and his chums listed above, any number of INXS tunes would not be out of place in this list: Disappear, Never Tear Us Apart, New Sensation are all fabulous in their own way but none quite reach the class and beauty here. Anyway, enough of that. Beautiful Girl really is the most beautiful, if unintelligible, song, for the most Beautiful Girl. Hey ho.
Footnote: the grapes are a) the wrong colour and b) probably not from New Zealand. Someone, somewhere understands the significance of these facts.
Kevin Ayers – Shouting In A Bucket Blues Schlong
Until I watched a rerun of the OGWT (one for the teenagers), I had never heard of Kevin Ayers, or any of his not inconsiderable associated musical history – the 1970s psychedelic, folky, hedgemonkey thing was not really _my_thing – admission to liking the genre would have seriously hampered my bony-black-arse Inner London street cred of the time. Subsequently, I know only two things about Kevin: 1) he’s dead, and 2) and I have this on very trusted friend authority, he was really well endowed. Putting that to one side, although quite frankly I wouldn’t, it seems that Kevin was also a hopeless romantic, and went through various ups and downs in his rock star life, as you do, and that he could only write songs when he was ‘in love’. In the event of being barren in the writing department, I know where I would have looked for solace. I don’t know whether the bloke who told the bloke who told me about KA’s appendage was overly-endowed himself but boy, he had some story: a married man for a number of years, and to all that knew the couple all seemed as well. However, TBWTTBWTM like to ‘put it about’, apparently. That in itself is what it is and is his dog, so to speak but not content enough with doing what he did, he took it upon himself to document everything about his conquests. Everything. Age, size, quality, things-they-enjoyed, things-he-enjoyed, ratings, names, addresses. Everything. And, one day, he left the notepad in the marital bedroom ready for his wife to critique, apparently. Back to the song: KA’s baritone voice is mellifluous and sexy yet carries a degree of melancholy at the same time. The blues guitar and clever lyrics just make this a simple yet lovely number which, from I’ve read about KA, sums him up quite nicely.
Footnote: this may come as no real surprise but Mr & Mrs TBWTTBWTM are no longer an item.
Talisk – Echo Fish bowl
So close to being perfect. So close. If you have been paying attention, you would know that the folk genre wasn’t really ever my thing – street cred and all that – but the older I get the less street cred I have, so more music genre are now allowed in my life. Echo gradually builds and moves up levels as it progresses, into a marvellous folky, fast-paced melange of Celtic fiddle, concertina & guitar. Both me and the person who introduced me to the tune couldn’t work out whether the song was called ‘Talisk by Echo’, or vice versa. Safe to say the regular cocktails of vodka, ginger beer, (fresh) lime juice, all topped up with ice, contributed to that. Plus the fact the vodka was measured out from an egg cup the size of a fish bowl in multiples of three (at least). Still, a fantastic tune. But then anything would sound good after that amount of alcohol. Except the ending.
Propaganda – Duel Wubble Yoo
To me, there is no more sexier female accent than that of the English-speaking-but-American-tinted central European voice. Enter the über sexy-voiced Claudia Brücken, and Propaganda. The band are Germanic sounding, which is no real surprise given the outfit are from Düsseldorf, although they sound cool enough to be from Berlin, (see other blogs for my Berlin thoughts). The synthesised-led intro starts as it means to go on, and go on it does for some two minutes until Claudia burst in, takes over, desperately trying to pronounce Ws correctly (won’t, wonder, etc) which only adds to the voice sexiness – Claudia, you can say it how you damn vell vant to. The instrumental intro and ending is the high quality artisan bread that sandwiches the delicious vocal filling, and unlike most other songs in this list, I simply can never, ever get bored of this tune.
Footnote: the song has been covered by Mandy Smith (among others). Just fuck right off.
Freeez – Mariposa فراشة
It’s weird what songs can make you remember. For no real reason (I have no idea where Freeez are from) but this gorgeous, sophisticated tune always takes me back to north London evenings, no matter where I am. Unexplainable, if that’s a word. Criminally, I have nothing else to add other than it’s a fantastic piece of music, and quite frankly the tune deserves a far better write-up than this. Mariposa is on EP (kids, go and ask someone old) with the almost-equally fabulous semi-famous Southern Freeez and not-at-all famous Flying High. After that the band went commercial and lost any credibility but probably made loads of money.
Footnote: mariposa is the Spanish word for butterfly, and a beautiful word it is. It’s a lovely word in French too: papillon, and even sounds acceptable in throat-rasping Dutch: vlinder. The Arabic translation is فراشة, which I have no problem with but in German: Schmetterling. At least the beer is good.
Incognito – Summer’s Ended Nonce
A simply magical, haunting and dreamy instrumental ‘old skool’ jazz funk tune from a band who I knew way back then. The tune gradually builds, slows and again builds, again slows, and then keeps on building, with the constant slapping of bass, background percussion, and absolutely magical flute arrangement which lifts the tune to greatness, to the final combined drum, bass and flute crescendo, all of which is utterly mesmerising. This is a tune which demands to be heard through headphones or earbuds. Whilst my link is Apple Music, there is a youtube user by the magnificently monikered ’Sir Groovington’, who has this on his public playlist. SG, understand that s|d would salute you from the highest but your profile tells me you are from Gillingham (and not the nice one). Be thankful I have given you time. Now jog on with your pitfall and skank girlfriend, nonce, as you would (possibly) say.
Footnote: Ian Cognito (AKA Paul Barbieri) was a very funny stand-up comedian who sadly passed away in April 2019. Sadly yes, but as with the greatest of live performers, IC died whilst playing live on stage (à la Tommy Cooper, of course). It is reported that one of Cognito’s last jokes before the absolute final act was: “Imagine having a stroke and waking up speaking Welsh”. Now, that is how to exit this world. Simply magnificent.
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